The Bionic Woman (1976): Episode 14 Review

Jaime Sommers is sent on her spookiest mission yet in The Bionic Woman episode 14, in which she must act as the governess for a lonely child. 

What do we have here? Is it a haunted mansion, or an invisible man, or something else? I can’t say for sure just yet, but Oscar (Richard Anderson) lets us know that it’s all happening in a place called Essexville, at the house of a Dr. Cory (Paul Shenar), who’s currently working on two very important components for the OSI’s “alpha sensor” project – whatever the hell that is. And, after the last governess-related “incident”, the OSI are sending in a new one, not just to look after Dr. Cory’s daughter, Amanda (Kristy McNichol), but to also have a little snoop ‘round the place. Who better suited for that than Ms. Jaime Sommers? Oh, and I’m sure it’s of no importance, but Essexville is rather close to Salem. 

What a great intro. It’s like the setup for a The Bionic Woman: What If…? episode: “What if an OSI scientist was haunted?”, or, “What if Jaime was a New England governess?”. Let’s just hope things don’t go on to be ruined by some made-up science jargon in a military-experiment-gone-awry-type of explanation, ey? 

So, there’s this big old house in a sleepy country town, and, at a distance, there’s this dude in a hat and glasses watching Jaime arrive. Inside the big old house is distracted father Alan Cory, who’s always very busy with important work in his lab – located in the basement, no doubt. And there’s also his daughter, Amanda, who quickly explains to Jaime that she (and her recently deceased mother) are the descendants of Rebecca Putnam, a witch who died in jail during the Salem witch trials, whilst she leafs through the pages of a witch book. A witch book!

There’s then a shot of the moon, a harpsichord on the soundtrack, creepy pictures on the wall, whistling wind, knocking doors, and an auditory witch trial flashback. This house really has it all! Though a few wolf howls here and there wouldn’t have gone amiss.

Soon, that very night in fact, chasing after a presence that disturbed the leaves outside of her window, and knocked over a bird bath, in the heavy fog and by lantern light, Jaime bumps into the dude in a hat and glasses – Emil Laslo (Bo Brundin), a German who investigates unusual phenomena. With his introduction, my paranoia thickens. Is this actually an enemy agent, soon to be revealed as vying against the OSI for some piece of tech? I hope not, because for now, to me, thinking Jaime to be in the middle of some oft-forgotten movie, like The Night Has Eyes (1942), or The Woman in Black (1982), or something adapted from a Stephen King story, is much more agreeable. 

The scientist, Dr. Cory, reckons himself to be the recipient of some communication from his late wife. She was a witch, or, not a witch, but a telekinetic – this being a much more sophisticated, empirical way of putting it – who promised, before she died, to contact him from beyond the grave. Which is all rather interesting. But then the bloke says to Jaime: “I had rather forgotten what it’s like to have an attractive, vital young woman around”. So… he’s a vampire? Or a cannibal or something? “Amanda’s other governesses have left a great deal to be desired”. Yep, sounds like a vampire to me. Either that or he’s just another pushy dude in an increasingly long line of pushy dudes to have made an appearance in The Bionic Woman. 

Little Amanda, however, is of the theory that her deceased mother is attempting to sabotage her father’s work so that he’ll spend more time with her, and that her mother is now targeting Jaime for she’s jealous of the way her still-living husband has begun to look at her. Which, if true, is utterly fantastic news. A dead witch, a once-dead cyborg, and an absent father. Have you ever heard of a love triangle quite like it? 

Suppressing my sarcasm for as long as I can manage, and to the credit of The Bionic Woman episode 14, there is an attention to Amanda’s psychology shown here that the show very rarely affords its characters, and a few production techniques not often seen, either. Like attaching the camera to an attacking tree branch, the aforementioned point-of-view shots, and the short (but welcome) use of b-roll – to name a few that I know how to name. 

You know, it wouldn’t surprise me to learn that all this was originally meant as something else, before being repurposed as The Bionic Woman episode 14. Not that it’s jarring or anything, it’s good to see the tired formula being used to create something different (as I similarly thought about “Canyon of Death”). Heck, the episode even ends on a sort of possession scene. It’s a rather good time. 

The series certainly could’ve ended on a worse note. And my watching it almost exactly coincides with Halloween, which is a nice bonus. And it can even be forcibly watched as a sort of X-Men: Origins story if you wanted to, which will probably always be a fun thing to do. …ah, to think Netflix went and canceled I Am Not Okay With This (2020) without a speck of remorse, those heartless bastards.

Episode 14 of The Bionic Woman is now available to watch on digital and on demand.